The Recovery: Panic Attacks and Breakdowns

So first thing to address, I’m getting rid of the numbers. By the time I get better completely, we’ll be at a silly number. So from now on this little series of blogs will be just known as “The Recovery”.

Now, onto the juicy bit. Panic attacks. They take on many different forms and can be caused by loads of different things. Some of the more serious causes of panic attacks and breakdowns can include (but are not limited to):

  • Severe stress
  • Loss of a loved one
  • Relationship breakdown
  • Problems at work
  • Exhaustion

Sometimes, though, the causes of panic attacks and breakdowns can be the most ridiculous things. The last two days have been like that for me. I’m feeling somewhat better at the moment but have had some rather silly breakdowns over the last couple days.

I’m writing this particular piece to hopefully give you all a bit of a chuckle and also hopefully show you all that anything at any time can cause a panic attack or breakdown and that’s okay. It’s not your fault. It’s  normal. It’ll pass. I promise. I’ve had 2 breakdowns and about 5 panic attacks.

Here are some of the things that have caused me some distress the last two days.

  • Not having the right berries in my local Tesco
  • Running out of Bonjela
  • Getting below 60 frames per second on a game
  • Dying in a game
  • Not being able to decide how I wanted to build my house on the Sims
  • The thought of seeing people in a social setting despite them being friends
  • Sleeping too late
  • Not sleeping enough

All of these things gave me reactions of varying severity. All of these things may seem like minor things to people. And even to me, on a good day, these things are pretty minor. But in the moment, at that exact time, it’s a huge problem and causes me to not function properly.

One thing that’s hard to do though, is remember that it’s not your fault. I constantly question whether or not I’m being pathetic. I regularly think that it’s my own fault and that I deserve to not find the right berries or to have an ulcer or to die in a game or anything more serious.

I have to tell myself over and over, “it’s not my fault” just as I want you to say it’s not yours. Panic attacks and breakdowns are unpredictable, horrible and so tough to prevent. I’m not going to tell anyone how to prevent panic attacks in this post but I will tell you how I prevent my own panic attacks eventually. I just wanted to remind everyone that if you have a panic attack, it’s okay.


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